Balance

     Balance. Sounds easy doesn't it? Life is hard to balance period, no matter what you have going on. Most of us have jobs, relationships, friends, family, and trying to keep all of those things where we want them is extremely hard. Once you have kids things change drastically. You usually lose friends who don't understand what it means to be a parents, your significant other becomes someone who you go to for everything, and they become your best friend. They also become your worst enemy! You start to become closer with you family, especially your mom! Now add work, time for your kids, time for you family, time for your lover, and most importantly time for yourself. Seems pretty impossible doesn't it?

    My balance usually starts with a really large glass of wine, around 9:30pm, alone, binge watching Once Upon a Time on Netflix. Before that I have Hulked out at work about 20 times, came home, said "No Reagan" about 1,000 times, and "Cody can you..." about another 1,000 times. I have one child and lose my mind everyday, let alone have more! All you moms out there with several kids, hats off to you, you deserve an award! Just this morning I had to ask Reagan why she insists on playing with my work out dvds, and shoving all the wipes in her mouth. Meanwhile she has all the toys she could ask for! At a year and a half she clearly told me she loves to just torment me. Sarcasm if you can't tell. This child is strange. She refuses to eat half the time, yet baby wipes is her choice of snack. I can't. Now I have two tv shows playing at the same time, I don't even know how to do that. How does she?! Coffee, I need more coffee.

     You have to learn to take care of yourself. I started exercising more, going for long runs, and yoga, all just to clear my mind. If I didn't take time for myself I would probably end up single, because Cody would not be able to tolerate me. Not really sure how he even still does, but that could go both ways I guess! I was doing everything all the time. Getting Reagan up in the mornings, getting her home after work, starting dinner, cleaning up dinner, cleaning up the house, getting her ready for bed, you know all that mom stuff. I would become so angry with him for not helping and I would just lose my shit! I then realized I have a pretty loud mouth and that if I need him to help me, just freaking tell him! Men can be kinda clueless at times. Now, Cody helps out more than I do! If you want something done you can't expect anyone to know unless you tell them. They can't read minds! Even though I am still convinced Cody should be able to read mine.

     Do not, I repeat do not bring work home with you. Its fine to talk and vent, but do not bring home the negative attitude. It affects everyone around you, even the kids. I would bring all my stress from work home and I was a huge bitch. I'm starting to see a trend here. Bitch, I keep using it! Hummmmm. Home is supposed to be your happy place. The place you wanna come to after a long days work. If you make your house a stressful place, no one is going to want to be there, not even you. I have also learned that if you are so unhappy with your job, change it!

     I'm lucky I have a little girl. We go shopping together, do hair, makeup, all the things I like to do! I make sure to spend time with her on the weekends, since I don't see much of her during the week. If I had a boy I would have no idea what I would do with him! Balance for a relationship is hard and that is another topic I will get into later but, the best balance for moms is to take care of themselves, and make time for themselves. You need to let go of the stress you carry everyday, or we all would be raging bitches 24/7! Find things that you enjoy to do alone. The less stress you hold in the happier you will be, and that goes for the loved ones around you too. Balance is hard, and sooner or later we all figure it out. If we can't, there is always a bottle of wine around the corner.